Tosyns Ten 10s: 10 Things the litterati mafia taught me

By Tosyn Bucknor

The books I read and movies I watched have all influenced me greatly. One day we shall have that ‘Cinderella’ talk but this week, it’s all about things I learnt from the mafia. Or the mafia as represented by books like ‘Godfather’ and ‘The Sicilian’ and movies like ‘Goodfellas’.

So if these movies and books only portrayed stereotypes Italians may fiercely dislike, like how we are not only the Nollywood and Caines Prize novels people see, then my apologies in advance.

10) A man who does not trust anyone cannot be trusted by anyone

I learnt this from ‘The Sicilian’ where when the enemy searched for how to bring someone down, they went to his friend who didn’t trust anyone.  If you have someone like that as a friend or in your organisation, it’s time to take note for real. And if you are that person, deal with your trust issues. Sometimes, our fears of how others will treat us are merely projections of how we treat others!

9)’kokoro ti n j’efo, inu efo l’onbe’

You know this idiom well! ‘The insect that eats the vegetable lives inside the vegetable’. The people ‘doing’ you are the people you let close. Back to ‘The Sicilian’. Remember who I said they went to to bring him down? His friend. The one who knew all his secrets and his plans and his hideouts. We cry ‘et tu Brutus?’ a lot in our lives but the simple truth is, the ones who hurt you are sometimes the ones closest to you!

8) You become a hero when u steal from the rich and give to the poor

Apparently, people will forgive you for the most grievous of sins if you can only show them you’re a giver… To the poor. Robin Hood knew that too. Imagine, the folklore equivalent of a superhero was one who spent his life stealing (and sometimes killing). But hey! He did it for the poor so it was okay. So did the main character in ‘The Sicilian’. He was a modern day Robin Hood. And the people loved him for it!

7) Deal with things internally

Too many people give up too much about the battles they are fighting at home or at work. In the books and movies I indulged in, snitches were lower than rats; you never turned!!! It was a code that even children knew about!

6) Meals are important

I could hardly turn a page or skip a scene without some kind of feast or drinking going on.
Eating was for nourishment, but also for networking. Business deals could be made over a glass of wine, ‘contracts’ could be given while clearing up. And sometimes, scores are settled at restaurants… (‘Godfather’ anyone?)

5) As is friendship

While the ’kokoro’ thing might dissuade you from forming close friendships, there’s no doubt that you are only as powerful as your network. Who has YOU as a contact? Who calls YOU?

4) No new friends? But more new enemies

The ‘no new friends’ theory people love to put up as pms and sing along to always amuses me and that’s going to be the subject of one of my ten 10s. But if mafia-based movies or books have taught me anything, it’s that you make an enemy a day no matter how hard you try not to. There are the toes yóu step on while expanding your business, there are the people you humiliated (willingly or unwillingly) in order to make a point, and so on. With each step (hopefully In the right direction) that you take, new enemies abound.

3) A stitch in time..

Sometimes opposing camps would have beef with one man. But they’d kill the man, his brothers and all his sons. If you destroy a man, his family will hold a grudge. And it may even be the 2 year old that watched it happen. Now while we may thankfully never be faced with that kind of life, it’s still a great rule of thumb for business- plug all holes. When you’re solving one issue now, think about the possible fall outs and deal with those too.

2) Not every persuasion involves a fist. Sometimes, a horse’s head will do

He needed a favour, he was snubbed. He didn’t whip out a gun, send thugs to beat the guy up or even make a single threat. All he did was have the head of the man’s favourite horse placed in bed with him in the middle of the night. Once again, no one is asking you to kill pets or send dead chickens in the mail, but sometimes, you get more with ‘gentle’ persuasion than threats or actual violence.

1) You’re only as safe today as you are today; it won’t extend till tomorrow.
So make plans Push boundaries, don’t give up, don’t depend on past achievements. Keep It. Moving.