A friend rushed into my office last week to announce that the exchange rate of the almighty American dollar has in one day crashed from about 350 to 220. He was all smiles and very elated. As far as he was concerned, things would realign in Nigeria without delay.
I asked my friend what was behind this very dramatic sudden rise in the value of our national currency. He said something about those hording the dollar being unmasked and something else about one Andy Ubah who has applied a magic formula to make the impossible possible.
I sighed and asked my friend if he had been drinking. I told him that there was no way the exchange rate of the dollar would suddenly crash except there was a huge supply of dollars from somewhere. I asked if there had been a significant upsurge in the price of crude oil, the main source of foreign exchange for the Nigerian nation and he said no.
I asked if Nigeria was suddenly exporting some new products and he said no. I asked my friend if our country had stopped importing toothpicks, toilet paper, bottled water, rice, apples, chairs and tables from everywhere in the world and he looked at me with pity. As far as he was concerned I was a dunce and could not appreciate the work of the Almighty and Andy Ubah!
My friend and I argued back and forth on the concept of supply and demand. I told him that if Nigerians truly want a better life, we have to roll up our sleeves and work and increase productivity. I told him that we have to cultivate the land that God has given us in abundance so that we can feed ourselves and have excess to export.
I was emphatic that there would be no quick fix. Nothing I said made any sense to my guy, a born again Christian with 100% belief in miracles of every type. When he left me, he was shaking his head. I knew that he was wondering how he ended up with a fool like me as a friend.
I am also a Christian but I believe that the good Lord created addition and subtraction. He created the medical sciences so that we can find the cures to Cancer, HIV and Ebola. I believe that God created Quantum Physics so that we can explore the Universe and go to places where man has never been.
He created Economics so that we can understand how to allocate resources and create sustainable wealth and lift our people from poverty. I am aware that when you ask people these days to apply common sense given to us by the Almighty, you run the risk of being seen as an unbeliever or an anti-Christ.
In any case, my friend came again to see me during the week. He was not looking very happy. When I raised the issue of the exchange rate, he decided to go use the rest room. He did not want to discuss the matter.
We both knew that the dollar was hanging tough at N350. It was not taking instructions from any pastor or Andy Ubah. The dollar has no interest in voodoo economics.
I am truly sorry but there are Nigerians who believe that the crazy exchange rate is a function of the wickedness of a Buhari, a man who does not want Nigerians to enjoy life! They mock you and ask how ‘change’ is working for you. A lot of these people believe that the nation has unlimited resources and if there is a shortfall in Naira, the president should simply flood everywhere with Naira and if there is limited foreign exchange in the system, Buhari should simply open the tap and let the dollar flow.
Have you not seen the child who wonders why you would not go to the bank and carry some money whenever you complain that you are broke? A lot of these people actually believe that things would have been better if GEJ was still in office. After all, EFCC would have remained asleep and the Dasuki dollars would have been in circulation!
There are of course those who believe that the high exchange rate is targeted at my kith and kin who are reputed to be Nigeria’s biggest importers of commercial goods. To them, ‘this is abundant proof that Buhari hates the Igbos… can’t you see that this is another sector in the Biafra War?!’
Sad, but that is what happens when your people are stuck in voodoo economics.
