Funmi Iyanda: ‘I’m Not Competing With Mo’ Abudu’

By Ayeni Adekunle

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b72hC_GtwV0[/youtube]

Funmi Iyanda is busy on this Tuesday afternoon. But she has to go see the Commissioner of Police over a case involving her friend who has been duped. ‘‘If we were in a proper society, I wouldn’t need to do this’’ she says, as she gives instructions to her staff and prepares to leave work.

Her Blackberry doesn’t stop ringing; doesn’t stop blinking red. There are guests waiting to see her and many calls to return.

She’s as busy as it gets.

And it’s not just because she’s just premiered her new TV show ‘Talk With Funmi’ or because she’s setting up her new office. Ms Iyanda, 39, has always been busy. It’s in her DNA. Not being busy, would mean not breathing oxygen.

But she’s busy for a purpose; as you’ll soon find out…

Sometime in 2008, we spotted you on Oxford street in London shopping. It wasn’t one of the big high street shops; it was either Primark or one of those small shops. It sort of reinforced the image one had of you, that this lady, if she wishes to shop in Yaba, she’ll shop in Yaba. She doesn’t really care. Is that who you are?

First of all, I really miss Yaba-Tejousho market. That is one of the things I like about being outside of Nigeria. The anonymity, you know when I enter the market I don’t get everybody calling my name. I appreciate that they are not intrusive in a bad way. But it doesn’t mean that you cannot be left alone to do the things you want to do. When I am outside of the country, I don’t get recognized as much but it happens even in a place like London where there are so many Nigerians. When I am in London, I see Nigerians who appreciate me. I think that from very early in life, I have learnt to know the things that are most important in life. So people around me know that I am me, and I think I am me; down to earth. I am a mother; I have an eight year old, what is the use of buying designer clothes for children? She will outgrow it in two weeks, sometimes one month. So I go to the small shops, buy nice things that children like. They love it! There was a designer skirt I wore one day and people were asking me where I got it; it was a 10 pounds skirt from Primark. I go to Primark, buy things and by the time I put it together, they look simple and lovely. Anywhere I go in the world, in New York, I go from the highest end of the designer shops to the street markets.

So it works in your favour most times?

It works in my favour most times.

Have there been times when it has worked against you, being real, being down to earth and unassuming?

For a class of people, it works against me. We all put on a mask to deal with the world. All of us have different kinds of masks. Some people have an iron mask, they can’t deal with who they are and their Nigerianess, or their Africaness; the authenticity of who they are. I will give you an example: in many parts of my life, I have associated myself with people who loved me. Some people fail to deal with who they are. I have always surrounded myself with people who are just like me. In a working environment in the course of my work when you have to go out and mix with people, you need people who are not like that. You know, people who don’t know how to deal with real people or things. Sometimes they ‘authentify’ you. So it works sometimes against me.

So was there ever a time when you thought that, maybe I should adjust a bit?

I did try, because I thought to myself that I was sorted out in terms of my emotional stability. And in growing up I was a very insecure girl because I was very tall and skinny and people used to abuse me but I outgrew that; I learnt to be confident about so many things. But recently, because I thought people wanted me to be in a certain way, dress in a certain way, conduct myself in a certain way. I tried a bit but what I realize is that the more you try to be someone else, the more you fail yourself and actually fail the people who love you. The expectations of people about you are never going to be met and there are many of them. How many versions of you are there going to be? So I thought to myself stop it! Even with the weight issue, people were taking about how I was too skinny so there was a time I said to myself that I was going to eat any how. I did not exercise in my life until after I had Morenike because I did not want to be skinnier than I was already. And then I got a woman who was enlightened and she told me if you exercise you will actually grow muscle and you will be better looking. I did and it worked. But outside, people were telling me I was too skinny so I stopped exercising and started eating badly. News flash: I remained skinny, grew a small pot belly and had cellulite. The worse thing was that they still were abusing me. So I was like sweetheart, live your life and be who God wants you to be.

What car do you drive?

I don’t have any car of mine but I have a Prado which the office gave to me. That’s the car I drive because it’s my official car.

Wheat was the last car you drove?

I had a Camry.

What happened to it?

It was stolen by armed robbers

You were not in the car?

Yes, but my sisters were.

So have you experienced armed robbery before?

Yes in my home.

When was this?

It happened when I was living in FESTAC. It’s very strange how these things happen I mean we were at home and they just walked in, a group of young men. My daughter was quite young and they had guns and stuff.

Were there no men in the house?

They were. It was a full house, they made us lie down and told me to go and bring all my jewelleries. I was so concerned about my daughter who kept screaming because she was afraid. I think they recognized me but they still had to do the job they were there for and so they said I should give them all my jewelleries; it was strange that they were even cheating themselves because some were down stairs and one of them followed me inside to get the jewelleries and he was telling me not to tell their leader I had given him my jewellery. That was quite traumatic. But I had one of the best pictures of my life the next day; everybody loved that picture.

The next day, I had to go to work, so I slept and woke up 5am the next day like I always do and went to the studio; I delivered one of the best shows of my life. I had no jewellery on; I only had some beads on because everything had been taken away the night before. I keep that picture as a testimony to myself that there will always be day break; just hang in there.

Ok so both robbery experiences, were they resolved by the police? Suspects arrested? Were they able to solve any of both robberies?

No they were not able to.

From that perspective, what would you say about the Nigerian situation?

Nigeria has come a long way. I think we have short memories. I lived through the Abacha years; I wasn’t one of those that left this country. I lived through the toxic fuel. I remember that for the first time in my life in 1997, I wanted to die. I was at that point where, if I could carry a gun and fight a war for this country, I would have. There was no hope, I came out of the university and there was nothing. You must remember that this country has changed tremendously from the past 15 years or so, there was no GSM in the country, there was no MTN, no celtel and no big companies. Nothing was happening. Although Nigeria is not anywhere near what we would want it to be but we are in the learning process and remember, there is no perfect society. Societies are self-perfecting. It is a human thing to seek perfection; we have come a long way but we have a longer way to go. Nobody can argue that this is what we need to be. Power situation has not improved, I run two generators side by side. The security is even better in Lagos, I don’t know about other parts of the country. There was a time I wanted to move out of Lagos because then armed robbers would go from house to house every day but it has improved but then a lot more still needs to be done. In terms of employment, it’s not good. We are not structuring a ratio of graduate and jobs but the only thing I can say is that Nigerians deserve Nigeria. I Know when I say it people say I’m being controversial. I have been around Nigeria and hear people complain about Nigeria and when I ask them what do they want us to do, they just withdraw.

Is it not that they have become so impoverished that everyone is busy looking for a way to feed and survive?

Ayeni, the only people you can’t make excuses for are the children; the poor children don’t deserve it. You will find out that the parents of these children are civil servants who demand bribe. You will find out that their parents are policemen who demand bribe, bankers who demand bribe, CEOs of banks who make millions but won’t give money to entrepreneurs.  There are two ways to look at it. If someone comes and says this is what happened to me, we will sit down and feel sorry for the person but we will never admire that person. But if some other person may come and say this is what happened to me and this is what I did about it. That is just admirable. You understand? When are we going to do something about the situation of the country?

I was in a community recently in Ondo and met this man, he was a very intelligent person, one of the most astute, one of the most intelligent men I met there. When I asked him why he didn’t go into politics to change his community, he said he didn’t go to school. So I told him but you have SSCE and he said yes. I said all you need to contest for Councillorship is just an SSCE certificate. He said he has never thought about it. The same community when I got there they were praying, they had no toilet, the children were sick and I said why haven’t you dug a toilet? Let them dig a toilet and go to their leaders and demand that they do what they have to do. How do we think those societies we talk about turned around if nobody was willing to make sacrifices?

God has given us so much; other parts of Africa admire us. There is nowhere else you will find people with our kind of zeal. I was coming on the plane one day, from Tanzania when I met these young Ibo men who were trading, and they go to China every three weeks. How many African countries can you find that? Other people will sit around and be looking. So all we need to do is to turn around that God –given energy. Other countries are already doing that if we can turn around that energy, Nigeria will get better. Number one is to demand our rights and number two is to do the right thing. I go around, and I can tell you, Corporate Nigeria is as complicit as political Nigeria.

Imagine the amount of money we are talking about in the banking sector? If the money had been channelled into the right corners there would have been changes. Can you imagine the amount of money people messed around with? If the money had been channelled into the hands of entrepreneurs, the manufacturers and all that. Imagine how that will trickle down and reduce poverty.

If corporate Nigeria can develop, we can continue to develop our political blocks. Why are we all fighting about oil blocks? What about agriculture, what about the entertainment industry? What about other areas of our economy?

Is your daughter getting the kind of education you want?

No! I pay a lot  of money to get her educated but the kind of education I would have preferred for her to get is not an elitist education; I’d have preferred a situation where she mixes with people with varied background. I want her to get on the bus and go to where she wants to go. If she was schooling abroad, she would be taking a bus or train to school. So I am not happy at all about that. You need to read the article I wrote a long time ago. If rich people cannot send their children to schools outside the country, we will develop the public schools. No society will function without education. Look at all these bright men from China and India. How are they turning their countries around? It is education. Unfortunately, it is another of the bad things in Nigeria. Primary school teachers are taking bribes from school children. Not their parents any more but the children. How can you? Leave the job and don’t corrupt the children!

In terms of career and material achievement do you think you have achieved what you set out to achieve?

Actually In terms of achievement, I have never worked for money, I have worked with the conviction that things need to be done and often times I get it done. So for me, it’s never an issue and in terms of material things, there’s really nothing I want that I can’t get and I don’t require that much; I don’t need to get everything at the same time. If I want to go to any part of the world, I can go.  The world has become more structures. If you’re smart with your savings, if you’re smart with planning ahead, you can get a lot of things done. I don’t need a 40,000 pounds designer dress; I think it’s crazy. I’ll never buy it. The international celebrities don’t buy it. I don’t need a designer cloth.

But you could buy a private jet?

Why would I need a private jet for? You must also look at it in the context of your environment. Maybe if I was American… But in Nigeria, you’ll cut yourself off from the people.

So what’s that one thing you have invested and you felt it wasn’t worth it?

I am not that kind of person. I mean I’m like every other woman, when I’m a little depressed, a little bit of shopping cheers me up.  My friends laugh at me; I buy a lot of my clothes on sale abroad. Why should I give my money to Oyinbo when I know that in two months time the dress will fade? May be a piece of jewellery though, there’s a particular jewellery I bought but it’s not that sort of extravagance that will make my mother turn in her grave. I don’t like to do things like that. People’ll be shocked at how frugal I can be

Did you grow up not lacking anything?

Growing up, we didn’t have money, we did not have a lot of comfort but I didn’t have a sense of lack. I never lacked for love. My mother died young I have never doubted my father’s love for me and my siblings. And I think that’s what children need most. It gives you confidence, assurance. So I never lacked imagination. I have always positioned myself in my mind where I want to be so I have never felt a sense of lack. I feel sometimes, a sense of frustration, like everybody else. I pray to God to trust me with money because you already know it’ll be in good hands.

Are you a Christian?

I have Christian convictions.

What do you mean?

We were raised as Christians and naturally, I lean towards Christianity. Christianity is what I know, although I don’t carry it in my forehead or try to appear as a born again person. One of my favourite passages in the Bible is that we should not pray as the Pharisees and the Sadducees, when they stand at the gate city, so that everybody will see. I don’t say I am born again because in Nigeria it’s a slogan; a marketing tool, people go to church to meet the bank MD’s so I tell myself I can’t do it.  It’s OK for them, but me, I can’t fool God!

You studied geography in school

Yes I studied Geography in school.

Where do they meet: Science and religion?

I mean I studied Geography in school as a joke. My brother dared me. I taught myself a lot of subjects because I attended a Jakande school and I had this female teacher who was always pregnant and I loved her dearly. My mother inculcated in me the need to succeed so I thought myself Geography and I had an A1. When I wanted to fill my JAMB form, I actually wanted to study Medicine but since I failed JAMB the first time, I decided to study law. I applied to study law and was contemplating a second choice so my brother who knew I loved Geography told me to fill it in so I did and was admitted to study Geography.

I had plans of changing in my second year but I was enjoying the course and I graduated with a degree in geography.

I was raised as a Jehovah witness so in my early years, I already knew about God and it wasn’t just from physics. I understood the essence of life. But as I studied more, I began to wonder if there was indeed somebody; it could be a ‘She’, I don’t know why people assume that He’s a guy. The way ‘She’ behaves, I’m convinced that it’s ‘Mama God’ that I see up there. There were periods when I wasn’t sure, but I’ve chosen to believe in a supreme being. It might be intellectual laziness, I admit. But my life is easier for me to accept that there’s a supreme being. I don’t believe that this Supreme Being is this nasty old God they make Him out to be; who’s just making life miserable for people. I don’t agree. I think it’s beautiful the way He has ordered the world and another part of the Bible I really like is that part that says ‘God is a God of order and arrangement’’.   And we all have a role in that order.

So what’s your role here?

I remember when I was applying for American visa and the guy who was to grant the visa was like wow! Won’t you like to work for CNN? I told him hell no why would I want to do that? I am Funmi Iyanda from Nigeria and my people love, admire and respect me. My life is about that. My life is about relationships.

I was put here to do a job, I know that and I know my strength is the ability to convince people because I myself in my heart am convinced about the things am doing. So because of that, I try to communicate issues using all kind of media. My intentions are generally to do something that will make a difference in my society… If I say God is a God of order, am I now doubting that he created me in Nigeria for a purpose? What else will I be doing rather to make my life meaningful so I can go back to where I came from fulfilled?

Do you work like you have a deadline or you work because you fear failure?

I work because I can breathe. If I woke up one morning and I wasn’t breathing, I’ll be dead so there’s no point; it’s all over. I am not trying to prove any point. It’s a marathon with a long line of different people with their own baton looking to take over from you. It teaches you humility no matter how much great deeds God has given to you and two, I don’t have a fear of death; If I didn’t know myself before I got here so I believe where ever it is I am going, I will be fine. So while I am here, let me do the best that I can do. I don’t fear failure because I don’t know what it is, you might want to do something and you don’t succeed, the process is ongoing. Now you are not knocking at the door anymore, they know you already. So the process has started. I think one of the greatest failures of our human society is that we put a yardstick for failure.

New Dawn was on when Moments with Mo debuted and lots of people felt such show should have been done by you. It wasn’t too long that you took New Dawn and started work on TWF. Most people say oh, ‘she has been challenged’. How would you have felt if the show eventually started and people didn’t like it?

Let me give you an example, my director told me when we were shooting that it’s been a long journey, let’s hope we make our money. And then he added, that well, if we don’t, f…k it; we’ll move to the next thing! It’s unfortunate; the drama about moments with mo. When people were saying stuffs regarding my programme and Moments with Mo it didn’t get to me because I run my own race. In every business, you must know your own values, your core strengths and you must only work to your own core strengths. So I didn’t set out to do a show and I don’t have to explain. Anyway, talking about Moments with Mo, I think she has done tremendously well coming from a business background with no experience in the media. I had already made up my mind to do a different show since 2007. I even have it in my diary written down. If you study my career, you’ll discover that I always want to do  the next thing. You must remember when I started there was no platform,  people forget these things; there was no GSM. In the studio we were using multilinks and my challenge was to teach young people that you must run your own race.

So it was people’s expectation but it wasn’t mine. What I wanted to do was to go challenge myself creatively; go in a completely different direction. I knew I had to gather the resources; these things are not easy in Nigeria. Sometimes If I look at all we’ve been through to put the new show together, I look at myself in the mirror and say to myself you are a strong woman.

There was a lot of drama at NTA; your dressing and all…

I said to someone recently, that all the wahala I had at NTA for eight years, is not even up to the wahala I’ve had with TWF in one year

I like NTA; that’s the only station that reaches everyone in Nigeria. Two, there are a lot of people at NTA who know what they are doing. With NTA 10, I stay where I am loved. I will never go to where everything is shining just because it is shining. NTA 10 family have always to a large extent showed me love even when we fight. One of the directors that we used to argue a lot is now one of my best friends. He actually called me up one day to talk me down about a dress I was wearing but we are friends now. He has seen through that and understood me.

Nobody will ever tell me what I must wear, when I am approaching 40 and somebody still telling me what to wear? What is accepted in Moslem setting is different from what is accepted in the Christian setting so Women are very subjective. I am creative and like to express myself so people must get a grip about dressing. We put undue pressure about what women should wear, in Nigeria particularly; although I know that there’s a lot of education that needs to be done because people don’t know how to dress, particularly younger people. Some people complain when they see me at events. What do they expect me to wear at a glamorous event? ‘Hijab’’? If I was a Muslim woman, I would wear ‘Hijab’. These are some of the challenges we have in the society and it’ all about pretension. I don’t pretend; I show you who I am. You either buy it or you don’t. And the truth of the matter is that people eventually catch on to who you are.  But if you force yourself into what you are not at the end of the day, you will be miserable and life is too short to be miserable.

They complain about breasts sometime, if God didn’t want it that way, he would have concealed it. I remember people telling me they can see the imprint of my breast. If God didn’t want it to be seen, he would have tucked it away. For the poor girls who have big breasts, they are conscious and the less confident ones are even bending. Meanwhile, if you don’t have they will abuse you.

How is Morenike, how old is she?

She is eight going on nine; she is very creative; she has so much creative energy to make comic books. She expresses the emotion of each character. She is a creative energy. God put her here for a reason so she has to choose her path.

What was the most difficult part of the role bringing up a daughter and having to balance that with work?

Working is tough. There were times I rushed to work as early as five am and didn’t get home till midnight. I get so busy sometimes on the phone for two hours. My daily schedule involves leaving home early; working till five, get home to write my blog. Although my sister helps with taking care of her, there is nothing like a one on one. So I try as much as possible to achieve that. On the day she doesn’t have extra lessons to do I bring her to the office. That is exactly the reason why my office is located here.

Did you plan to be a single mother.

I’m glad that you raised that issue and am also glad about a lot of the terms you used. We have women who become single mothers because their partners die. I did not plan to be a single woman; I actually did not plan to be a mother. I love children; I have 98 children on scholarship but I did not want to have children. I think that once again some things take place for something. I like the idea of children in a proper home, with both parents; but I wasn’t great about the idea of marriage. Like every woman if I find the right companion I might get married but I don’t like the context of our environment where people are put under too much pressure. One to get married, two to stay married and three to have kids. So within that marriage there are too many forces driving the marriage apart. Let me tell you it is easier to be married out of Nigeria than to be married here because I have seen many come back you would actually see those forces coming at them. I am much older now and also I know what I am looking for.

People say African men are afraid of strong women who have strong personalities?

Let me tell you something: all men are frightened of independent women so it’s not a Nigerian thing. I’ll give you an example of a summit we had in Vienna and I was in a group of six women from different continent and they all had the same story to tell so it’s a universal thing. I think it’s a genetic programming. But Nigeria has her own peculiarity because there aren’t structures that protect the marriages. The battles that are fought are not the ones we are supposed to be fighting. And I have also noticed that Nigerian men mistake submission for respect and love. The person who is submissive is your slave. All the slaves that were driven out of Africa were submissive. No woman wants to be a slave? You want a woman who loves and respects you. So the word submissive should be removed from the dictionary. I think that the Nigerian situation, we are copying too much things which are not in our culture. You and I know that most marriages are just there and that’s not the best way for anybody to live so we need to examine the reason why we have expectations; some parents live their own life through their children. They expect their children to have their own life.

If your daughter comes home with her SSCE results and says she wants to study Yoruba or creative arts, will you let her have her way?

Definitely! The concept of ownership I wrong. I can only direct her. One of the things I’m working on as a mother is to teach her to make better value judgement in everything. I talk to her as an adult; my job as a mother is to be there for her when she makes mistakes; not telling her that she won’t make mistakes. There are no human beings that do not make mistakes. If you set someone not to make mistakes, you set that person for failure. I don’t want my daughter to be too afraid to tell me if she’s made a mistake. My job is to be there for her, I will provide company, and I will provide support. I know you can make a profession of anything if that’s what you were wired to do and if you are passionate about it. I am teaching her the work ethics from now. I tell her you have to work hard in life.

So what happened with your mother?

My mother died, she was missing. She’s always been missing; she just left home and never came back. She left home, she died and we were never able to bury her. The year was 1979; there was an accident on her route in Lagos on that day and quite a lot of people were burnt beyond recognition so we believed she was there. Then we live in a country where there’s no forensic facility to determine such issues. When I was younger I used to be tormented by the thoughts because my mother had eight children the last of whom was four months when she died. My mother died when she was 39.

Our mother had Eight Children. The youngest of them was four Months when she died. And She died at the age of 39, I will be 39 this year. Maybe you were right. Maybe I also felt that I will have only 39 Years and I need to do everything.

To do some of the most sublime things in the world. You need to put everything you have and what you don’t have.  I will tell you for example about this past year. It’s been one of the most trying years in my life. And to even do the show that we have done now. It’s an amazing feet. I mean back to what you are asking about, I was setting out to do something, I wanted to challenge myself greatly. And to be able to do that with the limited resources and to still get all the things I wanted; that took everything. And if I didn’t live in a place, that’s why I must appreciate Nigerians, If I didn’t live in a place like Nigeria maybe I could have lost my mind.  I have a wonderful support system. My friend Remi Lagos, Bose Afolabi who is the best human being that I have ever met, Tayo Uthomi, Temilola Esan, and my friend and my director Chris Dada, who is an amazing human being . I don’t know how I would have done any of these. And of course some of the people who work with me.

How were you able to raise the fund?

It was two years of knocking on doors. Two years of business plans, meet this investor, meet this bank…

Considering your background. One would have thought it would have been easier

That’s a mistake people make. It’s a huge mistake. Number one I am not really that much of a mixer. I know people and they know me, but I am not the type to go and sit down in your home and your office. Otherwise how would I get anything done.  Then two, I must admit to you that this society is too flawed  in certain ways. For a woman, particularly not just single women all, women. And a lot of the things people do on padi padi, of course they have other things going on with them. Am afraid I don’t do that.

Why do you think.. People insinuate that you’re close to this governor, dating that governor.

It used to hurt me terribly; it used to really hurt me because If there is something I have really worked for all my life, it’s respect. I demand people give me respect for all I have done. So it used to be very very hurtful. And it took a while to even be able to get over it. And there I was, Explaining and defending until my friend, Temilola told me one day that look, never explain. Your enemies don’t believe you, your friends don’t need it. So at first it used to be very hurtful. Then something tremendous happened to me once. A woman who was a friend of mine, a  very professional, married woman in Shell. One day I was crying and was telling her look at what they are saying about me and she started laughing. She said, look Funmi, they say it about me too now. And you can never find a more Christain, straight laced, straight forward woman in life. Later on I even became more friendly with some very high achieving female ministers in Nigeria.  That we all know that these woman are successful in their own right. And they say the same thing about them. I say to myself, they say these things to hold women down. And it’s true. Even me that had written about it in Gisting, I didn’t understand why I didn’t understand it again. I wrote years ago that If I drive past a policeman that is being aggressive, and he asks of my papers one of the ways to disarm him is to say, Ha oga sorry o. I don’t know where my oga kept the particulars of the papers o.. You know me as an ordinary woman I don’t know anything o. He feels happy. Because if he thinks  you have achieved all that by yourself, it’ll make him feel worse about himself and you might not live there.

What do you think of oprah?

I think she has done a tremendous job for her environment. I think she is a role model for women. I think her honesty shines through what she does. I have never wanted to be Oprah. I have always wanted to be Funmi Iyanda.  Chife Olushola, who should know, gave me one of the best advices of my life when I was starting out. At 25, when i went to interview him, he said what are your plans. I said I want to be the Barbara Walters of Nigeria. He looked me in the eye and this is exactly what he said. He said you, with your longish self, and your longish name. You can not be the Barbara Walter of Africa. Then he said you are going to be the Funmi Iyanda of Africa.  That is one thing I will never forget in my life. When I started New Dawn, I had never seen one Oprah show. Because the things I do, I came about them on my own conviction. I never use or borrow convictions from any one.

Who is your favourite, Oprah or Tyra Banks

Let me tell you this: if we had organised our own media properly, I would not have been doing a talk show. I was censored into talk format. I would have done something completely different.

There is no comparison between Oprah and Tyra Banks. Particularly in the concept of their environment and what they do and what they have been able to achieve.  So I think that each one stands out in what they do. But Oprah of all time, Oprah’s achievement cannot be disputed; what she is doing and what she has. And one of the things I admire about her even though I didn’t agree with it at that time was her decision to endorse Obama.  She stood by her convictions. Fortunately she was proven right. But I respect the ability to stand by your conviction; Even though technically she shouldn’t have done that because of ethics. What I love about Tyra Banks is that she is fantastic with what she does…